Hello everyone! Wow, I disappeared for three months! I hope that’s ok… Anyway, I have a very good reason for why I’ve left, so bear with me here. Anyway, it all started the week I left. I was photographing a rather large and beautiful blue flower.

He’s very mean, so I was doing it in secret. Suddenly, though, the lens cap slipped out of my hand, and got covered I dirt from the ground. When I reached down to grab it, I lost my balance, and tripped down the cliff behind me!

When I landed, I wasn’t really hurt. But I was stuck down there, and since I had been photographing in secret, no one knew I was there! So there I was, at the bottom of a cliff, and darkness was coming it was all I could do to build a fire and roast hot dogs.

When I woke up in the morning, I knew I had to do something. So I reached down, took a rock, said “Here goes nothing” used it to put out the fire, and walked up the stone escalator behind me. Needless to say, when I got back my parents were surprised. They’d thought I’d left for good this time. They had already turned my room into a study, and my art studio in the living room was gone!

I was obviously very mad at my parents. They did seem to feel bad about it, but still. I forced them to remake everything I had done, including my paintings, and have it done within the week. However once they realized how expensive that would be, they realized they couldn’t do it. So they decided to put me in a nursing home.

Unfortunately for them, I wouldn’t allow that. Once I was officially enrolled, I hatched a plan for my escape. As it turns out, the patients are allowed into the kitchen. So, using that old guy’s medication from the next room, I made a cake for the guards that would put them to sleep (this was a high security nursing home).

As I’m sure you can imagine, once I was out, there was no stopping me. The first thing I did was break into a butterfly greenhouse and steal all the butterflies, then sell them to myself for 50,000 dollars (can I help it if I like butterflies?)

After a few weeks of that, though, I realized something was missing. Sleeping on a sidewalk just wasn’t comfortable. So then I thought of people that care about me. Family had given up searching for me after a few hours, so they clearly didn’t. But then I thought, you guys have said that you care about me, or at least my posts! So if any of you wouldn’t mind if I stay at your house until I turn 18, I’d really appreciate it!
Thanks,
Simon
P.S. It’s good to be back.
P.P.S. Sorry to which one of you I stole this computer from.
P.P.P.S I took ALL of those pictures!